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My Darker Days

by Biiko

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1.
Matt Damon 03:48
2.
there was a dream, i knew i had to dream it fifty fifty's never much, but i'm out of touch inches away racking my brain to give you reasons to stay maybe there's a line i haven't thought of yet? maybe there's a chance if i keep scribbling, scribbling dribbling drool won't do me no good unconventional, sure, but cracking open my hood you pump my heart, set my veins on fire shake my soul when cliches are tired straightforward's gotta be the path to take so it's a damn shame i'm not cool enough to say "stay with me, the possibilities are endless, love" the wind in the reeds, i hear it speak your name it's like a bulwark mirth against every day the same all i wanted was time but all i needed was birth reincarnate my essence, rip lids off, unearth all the stories i've hidden in alcoves long past taste excitement and yearning from truths you're still learning the wind in the reeds, the story on my hands it's talking that's painless when my sharing's shameless there was a dream, i knew i had to dream it sixty-forty, yeah i'm ever the optimist. what's there to say? ten-ninety's probably accurate, but despair's passé i know that's hypocritical in my darker days but there's glimmers that i'll get it not giving in, giving in giving up now won't do me no good so if i'm wrong this time, then it's still sublime to believe again this journey my feet tread will lead me on to greater things cause i can change my life, but i can't change my death so take the ride, it's all i've got oh say you stayed with me the possibilities are endless, love i'm itching to know what's in store so stay with me, the possibilities are endless, love i'm itching to know what's in store
3.
4.
A Safe Space 00:58
5.
guess we're talking bout diamonds now? nonsequiters in a vacuum but hey, at least it sounds cool though no radio would think so oh my lanta, what can i say to keep your interest? it's all too trite, i need a break so hear you go slam, bam, thank you ma'am don't know where it's coming from feeling strong til you realize it don't mean a damn cause i tried way to hard tried and tried til i was forced to look at what i am some poor sap that gave a damn
6.
These Pills 04:15
if i take these pills will it matter anymore? or will it stay the same, but in a different, funny, stupid kind of way if i take two pills will you go away? will you go away and stay? go away and stay this time? what does it matter now what does it matter anymore not that i'm keeping score i've got something to say, but it slipped my mind it's on the tip of my tongue maybe i'll claim i'm just insane, say that the feeling's lost on me how could i possibly understand my brain? but it's such a shame i'll believe my lies all of the days that i spread them up and down my body praying hard you'll never see my core, and what it has in store for you and the wishes that i'll keep untrue because i'd rather let the dream sink in than ever hurt again
7.
hahahahaha
8.
Rock Bottom 02:24
9.
"help me, help me" it's what she said with her eyes before she fell out for crimes she's still committing and i'm still committed, so "help me, help me" it's what she asked before they took and locked with a key inside a dark and dingy dungeon and i said no. well i said no i said no, and i said no "help me, help me it's what you promised, i asked you then and i need you now so help me help me help me, help me" no, it's time to take responsibility it's time to just accept that you're the one you've made yourself for a long time now, long time coming why? why? why? tell me why red in the face with embarrassment you'll sweat it out enjoy your time for a long time now, it's been a long time coming don't tare tell me that you need me for a long time now, long time coming why? why? why? tell me why
10.
11.
Afraid of Me 01:25
i do remember how we met and what it started throughout a mess i developed this insatiability and baby, i'd be afraid of me too oh i'd be afraid of me i do believe now in wanting what i had circumstance and trouble a match made, but not in heaven's hand and baby i'd be afraid of me too oh i'd be afraid of me
12.
Lims 02:57
13.
this is confusing for me wish i had the words but all i've got is gaps in reason you ever catch that glimpse inside someone else's vessel? i knew i liked you before i met you i'm not one for small talk though i've got too many other things in mind what's in my mind? i knew i liked you before i met you, oh that's just my gaps in reason talking sense has never been my forte they called me crazy they called me so many things i don't know the meaning of but where's my sanity? i swear i had it here beside me aren't you beside me?
14.
15.
Eparation 05:18
a part time sunset rolled in and spilled all it's rays the purples squished the reds out in my place, well the imagery gripped me and i followed my thoughts like a dandelion spore against the backdrop of the stars "if you're always looking up, you'll drown in the rain" that's what your father told me in a dream i had made your mother just kept quiet, she's got scales on her tongue so i caught my pace up and kept floating along but my progress is nothing because i get caught by pictures of kittens and games i don't remember oh my disconnected thinking's got me off of a leash because you, you always... you wouldn't wear tight clothes unless you cared what all those other eyes would see when they might look up but that's okay, i like the way they hold you cause i'm a sucker for a sweetheart with two reasons for me to separate my outsides for a good time off and on and off the path again i don't tread slowly break it down with middle fingers raised when i'm feeling filthy eventual remainders of the whole that i don't have time for if i'm not supposed to walk away then what are these feet for i don't mean to be unreasonable i've got my thoughts and you're just mad cause they ain't yours just because i'm not tired don't mean i'll never sleep again it's not like that, it's just not like that just because i won't fuck you don't mean i don't love you it's not like that, it's just not like that but what would you do if i told you your lips taste like plastic? and what would you do if i told you i only lie sometimes? but what would you do if i told you you words were contagious? and what would you do if i told you it's stuck in my mind?

about

My Darker Days is emotionally set in the final two years I spent in Chicago before moving to Michigan. There's always light in the darkness, and I wanted the album to show a valley, starting with brighter songs, before dipping into sounds that, in my mind, evoke a darker imagery. "Rock Bottom" is the song that marks the passing up to the other side of the valley, which has some steps with more energy, but with the knowledge of the previous descent.

Really though, this is the story of My Darker Days

credits

released October 16, 2016

All music by Biiko

Orchestral backing for Matt Damon and percussion for Whiter Shades of Grey and Lims found on freesound.org

Album art courtesy of Max van Schendel

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Biiko Chicago, Illinois

i just make music i like to hear and maybe someone else will too

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